Survivor Episodes... oh, a lot

There's a few episodes to cover, but I'm actually going to start by going back to Ye Olde Mhost Upsetting Episode. There was a lot of anger directed at Missy and Elizabeth. I spent a lot of time thinking about why they might not have seen the line the crossed, when it seems so obvious to us. I am not them and I'll never really know why they made the decisions they did.

I have a theory all the same.

I think it's because they are super competitive/professional athletes. (I'm not sure if Missy is a full-fledged a professional, but she's clearly on a high level.) And I think female athletes might just live in a world where there is unwanted/unasked for touching, particularly by older males. If that's what your reality has been for most of your life, I have the sense that maybe that line just isn't so clear. So I'm not going to rage about them. Their behavior was disappointing, but I'm thinking this is more symptomatic of American sports culture than it's about these two women being horrible people.

Moving on. Karishma was my MVP of the next episode. She spent an hour finding an idol and raised no eyebrows because she simply pretended to be sick. She has had no allies, rewards aka food, or immunity wins all season long. And yet she's still fighting and looking for a way in. I don't imagine that I would be Karishma's friend. But I respect the scrappiness. Or, to put a silly poker analogy out there: she's been the short stack the entire season, and she's been forced to play that kind of strategy. It's not pretty & it's not fun. But she's really good at it and is "leveling up" nicely.

I loved the double tribal where they split up and voted out Aaron and Missy consecutively. It was the correct play made all the sweeter by the fact that neither of them saw it coming.

And moving on again...

Elizabeth unremarkably went home in the episode after that - you know, the one where Dean glommed on to the phrase "goat army" and seemed to think he'd made some kind of groundbreaking revelation. I could make a goat/woat joke here, but that's sooo 2018, so instead:

Dean, in case this wasn't clear: me and baby goat are on the same page.

Highlight of this episode was Lauren's epic rise and fall in my estimation of her. She did really well with her IoI challenge and ability to read people. Then she insta-blew the advantage she'd earned by frantically playing her idol at the slightest whiff of danger. She might be cleverer than most people left in this game, but she's no match for type of game-play we should see in Season 40! (Note: I could not get my "i'm so freaking excited" meme to paste correctly. But believe me I am.)

Side note: is there any doubt that this season has had by FAR the most idol misplays (or lack of plays) in any Survivor season ever? It hurts to watch. Not literally though. And it certainly makes me question the quality of the castaways this season (well, that and the whole Karishma obsession... see below).

And now we're back to real time and this latest episode full of mishaps and buffoonery. A couple of highlights:

• Dean just about joined the Goat Army. Maybe that's why he bailed on the plan at the last minute. Not because he couldn't trust Noura to follow through on the plan. But because he mentally and emotionally couldn't imagine himself to be a goat. But you are, Dean. You really are.
• Noura's inability to do math properly on this one was unsurprising to me. She can't slow down enough. It's probably partly due to the sleep deprivation, starvation, and paranoia that comes with the game... but it's likely largely due to this being the way she is all the time.
• It's just sad that Karishma got voted out. I mean, why? Watching this "core 4" strategize is like watching my 3 year old playing that card game memory. When she doesn't get a match she obsesses over it. Picks the same 1st card every time and won't move on until she gets that match. It's a terrible strategy and it drives me nuts - both for memory and Survivor. And these are adults, not toddlers whose brains are still developing basic functions. There is no chance that Karishma wins (though I had a theory she could win in a final tribal that was Dean + Karishma + Noura... but even that was probably wishful thinking). So why on earth are you so obsessed with voting her out?
• What makes it worse is that literally no one is talking to her during the tribal council frenzy. The utter lack of respect that they show her is upsetting and insulting. Noura's rant after the reward challenge included a line like "they think I'm as useless as Karishma?!?!" (or something to that effect) in front of Karishma. And she just had to sit there and take it. That really sums up the kind of treatment she's been receiving for 30+ days. No wonder she was a blubbering mess when she saw her husband - his was the first kind face she'd seen in a month.
• Kellee says "these are the dumbest plays" to Jack as they wrap up tribal council and I couldn't agree more. Kellee, should you ever return to this game you will be my #1 draft pick. I heart you. 

Power Rankings:

I think Bag's got this one. 

Survivor Episode 8+9, and NOT 10

It took me a while to watch this mega episode. Maybe it's because my obsession with the new series Watchmen has transcended TV and now I'm devouring the graphic novel as well. But mostly it's because I had an inkling of what was in store and didn't want to have a shitty night.

In what has felt to me like an overwhelmingly supportive and positive season, there were absolutely no feel-good moments this time around. This could have been a momentous episode for far more lighthearted reasons. End Boss Kellee v. End Boss Missy is a fight that I wanted to see. What we got instead was Survivor gameplay at its worst.

I'm skipping any attempt at a recap because I really have just summary points to make:

Who were the winners here? 
No one.

Who were the losers?
Let's hit the highlights: all women, particularly the women on this season of Survivor. Which in itself is also particularly unfair. Somehow a man making a woman/women feel unsafe/uncomfortable has resulted in all the women coming out looking like bad guys. How is that possible?

Let's get into the really nasty stuff first, though, and then maybe we can end on a high note (though no promises):

- Dan.  In Tribal #2 his a refrain of "Why won't you let this go?" reeks. Kellee has been thinking the same thing for 20+ days. She TOLD YOU to back off. You did not. His response in imitating someone being uncomfortable as he accidentally brushed by someone around a crowded fire belittled Kellee's experience in their interactions. And he partially defended himself by claiming to come from the industry that produced the MeToo movement, while blatantly ignoring the fact that the same industry also produced Harvey Weinstein. I get that I am watching a TV show and that I clearly don't have all the facts. But I also find it hard to accept his response to what happened as being remotely close to acceptable. Whether he's a real sketchball or not, I'm not sure. But  that's the point. As Moon noted: "I don't believe his touchiness is sexual or nefarious. But it obviously disturbs his tribemates. They told him to stop and he hasn't." That's the point.

- Aaron. Aaron is such a fucking douchebag that I'm removing him from my team. Seriously. Touchy Dan too for that matter. Aaron: you are an ass hat. "I have a mom and sisters so I'm clearly sensitive to this issue" is a bullshit stance. Fun fact: we all have mothers, it comes as a package deal with human existence. Doesn't mean women have been treated fairly or respectively through human history. Jamal actually defends Aaron in his exit interview, which I think attests to Jamal's character. But if Aaron really didn't have enough real info to recognize what was going on then maybe he should pay more attention, listen more closely, and start considering that maybe he's not the king of the universe.

Okay, and here are some highlights:

- Kellee. Kellee played a fantastic game up until she trusted Lauren in the 11th hour of tribal council. She spoke her truths and anticipated what would happen if she made a big deal out of what was happening. And she was right. Hopefully Survivor history will recognize her as a kick ass player and not because of what happened. Because if you remove all the harrassment/uncomfortableness/gender biases that went down here, what we're really looking at is a showdown between Kellee and Missy. And Kellee wasn't going to have the numbers, or at best it would have been really close. So she should have played an idol.

- Janet. This is the sort of leadership that we need more of in this day and age. She's playing a game where people are expected to lie, manipulate, and back-stab each other. And she still knew exactly when a line was crossed, and stood behind that even though it was going to cost her. When she said "This has become a moral issue" then maybe she shouldn't have tried to address that issue via the avenues of the game. Maybe she should have had a more serious conversation with the producers at that point. But that's not a detail to get too hung up on. Janet did was she believed was right, and then got villified for it afterwards.

- Jamal. Say what you will about Jamal, the man has character. He may be bossy at times, but he is also compassionate, eloquent, intelligent, and sensitive. I really think what Jamal said during Tribal #2 is about as good as it gets when it comes to difficult issues like this. (Side note, though: he really needs to work on his meta game. The way he used that IoI advantage was a D+ effort.)

- Survivor. After finishing this episode I was left with intense feelings of anxiety, sadness, and anger. And for that, Survivor, I thank you. Survivor producers forced us all to experience and process an emotionally challenging situation that is all-too-common in today's society. I think they easily could have reframed this in a way that diminished what happened to Kellee and how Missy and Elizabeth behaved. I did not have fun watching this episode. But it certainly gave me a LOT to think about, and I'd like to think that most viewers of the show will be able to at minimum recognize how complicated these kinds of situations can be. Survivor definitely made mistakes on this one, but I appreciate that they didn't shy away from showing these events anyway.

Survivor 39: Episodes 6 & 7

Despite my bold claims in my last post, Dean is somehow still in this competition. Guess I'm maybe not as good at this game as I thought... and our team's score backs that up!

Episode 6 was super interesting. I love the dynamic of the Vokai 4 starting out thusly: "We're totally going to rocks, we have no doubts at all. We're so strong. And by the way we think we're smarter than you, cooler than you, and our farts smell like roses." And then Elaine pulls out her secret advantage, and they be like:



Okay, my attempt to find Lauren actually crying on the show was a bust. But this gif from what I can only assume is from Breaking Bad is a close 2nd. Plus, the upside is that I found this gem of an article: https://ew.com/recap/survivor-season-39-episode-6/.

Except that I disagree with everything this writer says about Aaron. First, and obviously most importantly, Kevin Bacon only won in his Footloose game of chicken because of a shoelace entanglement. Not because he was brave and bold.

Second, I think Aaron should had stuck with original Vokai and screwed over his original alliance. Maybe I'm on a self-destructive kick here, but that just made more sense to me. He seemed to get along with them really well, he could assimilate during the chaos of the impending merge, and come out the other side on the majority alliance and feeling pretty comfortable.

Instead, he's back-stabbed potential alliance by bold-faced lying to them and anchored himself to a minority alliance who just got the "beyond the grave" message from Jason of "don't trust Aaron."

But I do applaud this article's deep dive into the durag incident, the history of Survivor, and any mention of Probst being a great host. Because let's all admit it, the man is a great host. One of the best in my opinion, along with this guy:

But back to social awareness: Jamal and Jack had a really important and meaningful conversation where they both came out looking like stand-up guys. When does that ever happen in reality TV? I may throw a lot of shade Survivor's way, especially ever since they introduce that horrifyingly bad fire challenge when down to 4. But this show really does have its moments.

Okay, I could go on, but quite frankly the article linked above will do it better. Plus I have a whole other episode to get to... and it's a good one too!

Keeping in theme with this post (but not, I promise, for the whole season) here's another Not-My-Recap that's totally worth reading: https://ew.com/recap/survivor-season-39-episode-7/.  There's a deep dive into the "claims of women's alliances are sexist" theme of the tribal council that's super interesting. The author also really loves Kellee, and so do I. So we're clearly meant to be besties. Except that this guy's blog is so popular that Survivor pays for him to go on site and gets to test-run the challenges, so maybe this is more of a #frenemies situation. How has this blog not become internationally renowned, I ask you!?!

In any case, the talk of the town has to be Kellee's saving Dean and ousting Jack. To what end, Kellee? To what end? I'm all about the resume builder, but can she really trust Dean? And is it really a good idea to subvert your own majority alliance right before diving into a post-merge world? Am I opposed to this move just because I'm salty that Dean is still in the game? And if I keep asking questions and not blogging about the pool will you still read on?

Probably not, so let's get to it:

Power Rankings

1. Baggins - Tommy and Missy have been impressive all season, but even more importantly, Elizabeth is looking much savvier than her inaugural visit to the Island of the Idols. This team is poised to win individual challenges as well as drive many of the upcoming votes.

2. MoonBee - Another really good team, with Janet who continues to prove herself wise, crafty, and brazen.

3. Eric - Eric has Kellee and she's not on my team, which means there's hope! There's a nice mix of strategy and physicality on this team that I like. Plus Elaine is a dark horse that can't be ignored. I think this team has a shot, despite the Two Toms setback.

4. Phil - Has 5 players that made it to the merge which is huge... but 2 of them are Dean and I just can't help but feel like things aren't gonna end well because of it. Maybe it's just that this team feels like it's lacking in cleverness.

5. Michal & Ben - It feels like this season couldn't have gone worse for us, and yet we're somehow not the worst....

6. Doug & Bri - Will things turn around for this team now that we're merging? Karishma may end up earning them mad points via coattail riding. But I just don't think that will be enough to get this team a victory, and I don't see them earning a lot of points from challenges or idols either.

Survivor 39: Episodes 4 & 5

I have so many thoughts about the last couple episodes, and not enough time to share them. Regrets for not posting sooner? A few, but then again... too few to mention. So here's a few highlights:

• I loved the "this is Plan Z" speech by Missy. That _____ (I need your help finding the perfect word for it, please vote on the options below, or provide your own!) quickly elevated her in my power rankings. Well strategized, defended at tribal council, and then somehow perfectly concealed from Dean in the next episode
• Choose from the following nouns:
1. soliloquy
2. closing argument
3. monologue
4. diatribe
• Why did Missy really do it though? Wouldn't Karishma have been a better option? Or any dude? Maybe this was just a really good opportunity to build her resume, I'm not sure.

Episode 5 begins with Dean's unsuccessful attempt to uncover the mastermind behind Chelsea's demise. Then they do a tribal swap and a new gang of misfits is presented with the same dilemma that Orange, aka Lairo, has been battling all season long. Keep worthless Karishma around who you know you can beat post-merge, but lose every challenge between now and then? Or cut your anchor and see if you can compete in the next couple challenges?

Aside: my personal favorite moment in the episode is during the reward challenge when Probst describes Noura dragging an exhausted and non-participatory Karishma through the sand as "great teamwork."

My theory on this decision is that the Vokai majority decided that they have sufficient fodder in the original Lairo minority that it doesn't matter if they win. They can lose every challenge, remove the threat of an Original Lairo Alliance, and strengthen their own original alliance.

In the end, Tom gets voted out. While his early demise seemed inevitable, his unbelievable gracious and respectful exit interview was not. Tom does not have the instincts necessary to succeed at Survivor. But he is clearly good people.

Power Rankings:

1. Baggins - 3 players are quickly emerging as the biggest threats to win this game: Missy, Tommy, and Kellee. Missy and Tommy are both on Baggins' team and his supporting cast looks to be a pretty big physical threat too. Great for raking up the points in this league.

2. MoonBee - see above, but note the small hiccup of having drafted Vince. Also the bottom half of their team mirrors mine, which is ominous....

3. Eric - I like Eric's team, despite his double-Tom dinger. Kellee and Aaron I think are both doing really well. Jamal is over-performing considering when he was drafted.

4. Michal & Ben - our players aren't just dropping like flies. They are doing so with idols in their pockets. Stupid flies. And despite that, I have hope for our team. A hope that rests solely on Kellee and Aaron's shoulders as any solid performance from Jason or Touchy Dan will help MoonBee just as much as us.... But you gotta have hope, right? (Note that I am similarly delusional about my 3-5 record in my fantasy football league - brace yourselves for the greatest comeback ever!)

5. Phil - It's kind of insane and completely indicative of the strength of Phil's team that he still has all his players in the game, and yet his total score is abysmal. There is little hope for Dean surviving the next vote, barring some kind of deux ex machina move from Boston Rob & Sandra.

6. Doug & Bri - The only things worse than a double-Dean are a double-Noura or a double-Karishma... and one of those is real! Not a great start to their season. At the same time, I said probably literally the same thing around this time last season. And we know how that went. So I'm not writing them off completely. But it is pretty hard to see a path to victory right now for this team.

DoW:
I've got a perma-vote on Noura going for now. I'll let you know if/when that goes away.

Goodbye Survivor 38, G'day Survivor 39!

I know I owe a season finale post for Survivor 38. I must admit, I'm still a little salty about that season's format...

I hated everything about the Edge of Extinction. Except for you, Reem. You were a real peach.

That being said, Doug and Bri made a dramatic comeback to claim victory. Moonbee's hopes and dreams were crushed by a stacked Chris who might qualify as one of the least-deserving Survivor victors. I hope that he returns for the highly-anticipated and soon-to-be overly-hyped-by-this-blog Season 40... the season of all Victors! Or, as Ben called it, the Quarter Quell. And then I hope that Chris is the first to be sent to the Edge of Extinction and NOT be named the Sole Survivor at the end. He'll just slowly devolve into a Gollum kind of character, muttering about how he just wanted to play a perfect game.

But to you, Doug and Bri, I say:

And now, on to Season 39: Island of Probst's Future Replacement

Hmmm, that doesn't sound quite right. Oh yes, it's the Island of the Idols. But it doesn't appear to provide much of an advantage, does it? Even if you get an Idol you have to use it to save your skin, and if you don't get an idol... well, folks probably won't believe that and then you get voted out.

The draft was surprisingly pleasant and professional. I think we can all agree that none of us really know what to expect with this cast of castaways, nor with the twists that this season includes. I'm pretty excited about it, I see a decent amount of potential to this season.

Power Rankings:

18. Vince - his entire alliance had a conversation with Karishma except for him. And that didn't make him nervous enough to play his idol? I think he might have deserved to be sent home.

17. Karishma - insists on isolating herself, complaining about no one "playing the game" when it's clear that everyone is playing like a pro. It's pretty clear she has no idea what she's doing.

16. Noura - If they switch up the tribes, Noura and Karishma might make a fun pair. I hope they contrive to put this potential odd couple together to wreak havoc on the tribes.

15. Dean - Dean was much higher on my rankings list when I had no idea who he was. So far his only air time was of him making a huge blunder, and then trying to look cool by imitating Tyrion Lannister in a moment when he was decidedly not cool. "As someone once infamously said.... split the vote" .....  you are derivative, Dean, and I am not amused.

14. Touchy Dan - and I suppose that's enough said.

13. Tom - is clearly not playing the right game. I love watching athletes who've spent years being team players come on this show and do everything they can to keep their tribe united and victorious in challenges. That's not actually the point, unfortunately, but it is endearing.

12. Elizabeth - questionable 2nd overall pick from Phil imo. What a great athlete, but I'm afraid she's just not crafty enough.

11. Jamal - does not seem to handle setbacks all that well. I like that he's still playing the game hard, though it's not good that his name is already being brought up.

10. Lauren - I like her, but she's not getting enough air time. I'm taking that to mean she's not contributing much in the way of strategy.

9. Aaron - this aggro jock may make it fairly far. Not because he's good at this game, but because they'll use him for his muscle and he's one of the only one of those types left.

8. Elaine - has the backstory to win, but I'm not sure she's going to get to the end.... probably because of the backstory.

7. Missy - I think she's doing a great job, but her leadership role on the tribe might just be a bit too obvious. I'm worried she's putting a target on her back.

6. Janet - represented herself well against Elizabeth in the swimming part of this last challenge... though she's evidently not great with knots. I think she's doing great overall. Holding her own in challenges, has a good relationship with most people in her tribe, open to blindsides, etc. But she also needs to be prepared to drive the train at some point too.

5. Jack - I just loved how he bounced back from that blindside - what a champ! I think he's going to be that lovable doof that no one wants to get rid of, even when they know they should. #FabioJunior

4. Jason - I think he's being crafty. Laying low for now, but clearly capable of making big moves.

3. Kellee - I don't know why I think she's going far in this game. She's done fine, but I wouldn't say exceptional. And yet something tells me she's going to be around for a while.

2. Chelsea - it definitely feels like she's driving the train of her women's alliance, and I think she's making smart decisions. I'm sorry to see Vince go, but that keeps her on good terms with the 3 remaining bros on her tribe, which will be critical should they do a tribe mix-up soon.

1. Tommy - first one to mend the bonds after Molly's blindside. People are approaching him to discuss strategy. All signs point towards Tommy as an early favorite to win the whole thing.


That's all I've got for now. Would love to hear other's opinions on the Pool's power rankings, though!

Edge of Extinction: Ep 12 & 13

Welly welly welly well...

We're 2 days from the Survivor finale, 6 days from the GOT series finale, and I can think of nothing better to do than fill this blog post with random pop culture references and occasionally relevant analysis of a mediocre season of Survivor. Bottom 10 seasons of all time? Undoubtedly. Bottom 5? Perhaps, but honestly Reem's stellar performance on the Edge as the Ghost of Christmas Past might be saving it for me.

Is he dead? Did she kill him using only her words?

Speaking of finales, here are my top 5 fave TV series finales of all time:

5. The Office -- hahhahaha, just kidding, this show should've wrapped when Steve Carrell left
4. Friends
3. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
2. Breaking Bad
1. Battlestar Galactica

...and speaking of Battlestar: that thumb-up-to-the-sun-to-find-the-airborne-enemy-honing-in-on-your-location move that Euron Greyjoy pulled in S8E5 of GOT was a complete rip-off of Starbuck's move in S2E15 (aka "Scar") of Battlestar and it wasn't nearly as powerful a moment. #CommunityAin'tGotNothingOnThisPopCultureGame #QueenStarbuckNoWaitIMeanSansa

And now, this:

Okay, should we throw some Survivor in here? Here's the thing: there's no one left in the game who I'd truly be happy to see win this thing.



Let's belabor this point and do a full-on Survivor/GOT comparison:

• Julie = Theon. The weepiest of them all. 
• Lauren = Harry Strickland, Captain of the Golden Company. This casting screams physical threat, but what have they really done besides fail at the thing they should be best at?
• Victoria = Osha. Just something about the way she hunches over a fire... it just speaks Osha to me.
• Rick = Euron Greyjoy. Thinks he's funny but really isn't, thinks he's powerful but really isn't. Thinks he's sexy, but... well, you get the point.
• Gavin = Davos. I mean the guy's lovable in his own right, but would you really want to see him sitting on the Iron Throne in the end? I mean I guess he's better than the others, but really? Davos? 

What's lacking here? A main character. A hero. Someone to cheer for & believe in. Someone who's going to make the right choices for their people:

No, not you - get the fuck out, Jon Snow! See below, you asshole.

This is more like it:

You made a choice Brienne, and you chose wrong!

And on to the Survivor Pool scores:

5. Michal & Ben - 116 pts

4. MoonBee - 130 pts

4. Baggins - 130 pts

2. Eric - 154.5 pts

1. Doug & Bri - 181.5 pts

Power Rankings:

5. Michal & Ben - my Survivor team may be terrible, but at least I have a fighting chance in my Game of Game of Thrones pool! (Long live King Drogon?)

4. Baggins - this team had a seriously strong start followed by a dull & meandering middle, and will likely finish in a forgettable fashion. It's the Walking Dead of this season's Survivor Pool. Or, I suppose to more appropriately theme to this post:

Is this how you're getting to Storm's End too?

3. Eric - Best performance in Survivor Pool by Eric yet, but it won't be enough to get him that top spot. I'm so happy you achieved a lifetime goal of getting top billing in the Blog, but unfortunately this blog is fickle and unreliable, and now you're stuck with a middling ranking. 

but then.... you know...

2. Doug & Bri - Doug & Bri had a seriously rough start, followed by a massive comeback, with the potential for a very disappointing 2nd place finish. They need one of their bench players to be put back in the game, I think, to have a real shot at the trophy. (Speaking of, where's that trophy gotten itself to?) #JonStarkaeryan

1. MoonBee - In a powerful position with 3 players left and a high ceiling for point-earning potential. This was a well-drafted team that deserves to win the pool this season, unlike the castaway that wins Survivor this season. #QueenSansa #TheQueenTheyDeserve

Edge of Extinction: Ep 11

After catching up on a couple of chillingly accurate blog posts by Moon I'm back on the Survivor wagon & eager to see what comes next.

Sadly the story begins with Wardog at his worst as he rips on Gavin. Rick looks on smugly, like a cat that just got into cream. Soon after Ron, Rick, and Wardog plot like pretender mob bosses while Ben and I discuss how we'd like to see none of these castaways come back as veterans in future seasons. They are not likable, nor do I think they're all that good at playing Survivor.

Probst arrives to introduce the reward challenge, which I do not follow because I'm riveted by how unbelievably clean his shirt is. (I know this is random, but these are the consequences of a Pickett live-blogging.)

Wardog screws the pooch (get it?) by swimming to the wrong deck. Everything is ho-hum otherwise until Aurora enters the water and I'm again blown away by the physicality of this woman. She may be dumb as bricks but she is a challenge beast.

Then Probst calls Rick Gavin, and Eric's misstep in last week's blog comments is immediately validated. If Probst does it, then maybe we all should.

Julie, Lauren, Rick, and Wardog win the reward. Is this Lauren's first reward ever? (Note: I realize Wardog falls into the same category, but I don't particularly care about his well-being.)

Gavin plots his revenge during an unnecessary slow-mo of him swimming & then we cut to Reem reaming Kelley for almost no reason except that they might be spiking the well on the Edge with bitterness and bile. Would the Edge be 10 times more bearable if Reem didn't live on it like a menacing hermit? Overall this doesn't seem like a fabulous plot twist, but maybe it'd be better on a different, Reem-less season... I'd give the Edge one more try I suppose.

Cut to the mud bath reward & all I feel is uncomfortable. The mud rubbing is gross. Rick's dismissal of Julie & Lauren is repulsive. But fortunately we don't linger there long and soon are moving on to the immunity challenge. Which is kind of boring actually....

I think possibly one of the biggest problems with this season is the general puzzle ineptitude of the castaways. So many of these episodes end with them all looking around cluelessly and/or in frustration. Not the sort of thing that really draws you into the suspense of what's normally a pretty exciting few minutes of a Survivor episode.

Rick wins & now folks are deciding who to vote out. My mind gets blown as Wardog works Julie for her vote. Wardog is pushing for Aurora when Julie asks "Why should I believe you after the last vote?" to which Wardog responds "Well you were closer to Kelley than I was. You would've told Kelley, so I couldn't have told you. That makes sense, right?" Julie seemingly accedes to this nonsense, and I can't tell if she was just bullied that hard or if she maybe kind of believed him. But how could anyone agree to that statement after watching Wardog vote as a united block with Kelley on every vote that season? Madness!

Ultimately Wardog is too annoying to live with and/or the other castaways love Kelley so much they must take revenge. Hopefully the quality of play will start to improve now that he's gone.

The Teams:

• Baggins "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a Pro" - 106 pts
• Eric "Eric" - 123.5 pts
• Doug & Bri "Well, That Sucked" - 118.5 pts
• Michal & Ben "The Hammer" - 114 pts
• MoonBee "Nerdy White Dudes" - 96 pts

Power Rankings

1. Eric - Eric's has a couple of bad episodes, but I still like his remaining roster best. Also I think his Edge players might have the best chance of getting back on the show (I keep thinking it'll be Wentworth who comes back). Really solid & consistent season from Eric so far, hopefully he can keep this mo' going!

2. Doug & Bri - need a new team name. What a comeback! I do think Eric has a slight edge with Gavin & Julie over Rick & Ron. But there's nothing certain in this season

3. MoonBee - I appreciated Moon's individual power rankings in no small part because he put Victoria as #1 overall. Which is how I've long felt about this quiet assassin. Sadly she's not earning any points so far, but I do think she's chock full of potential to take this season. 

4. Baggins - This team isn't great (sorry Bag) but they do have 1 more "live" player than we do, which means....

5. Michal & Ben - Ugh. Our "physical" players have been beyond disappointing & while I'm happy to cheer for a Victoria victory, it won't be enough unless we get someone back from the Edge. And I'm definitely not using my "one time!" on this season. 

DoW

I think it's safe to say at this point that DoW has run its course. I love the comments but I'm just gonna shut this aspect of the pool/blog down as far as scoring goes. I'm not keeping up with it & it's unfair to pretend.... but can I give Reem a Lifetime Achievement DoW here at the end of a much-loved legacy?

Edge of Extinction: Episode Ten

Survivor: Edge of Extinction has suddenly been whittled to just eight remaining castaways after the elimination of its last two returning players. Though at least one player on the Edge will return to the fray, we're undoubtedly entering the homestretch of a wobbly season. We've got a capricious group of greenhorns vying for the title. Let's break 'em down.


Player Power Rankings:

8. Aurora has no friends and no respect. She's an instantly-forgettable player who will never re-enter our conscious after her elimination. But in this wonky season she's scored a crapload of points. Aurora has scored 29, eight more than second-place Julie, sixteen more than third-place Gavin. It doesn't feel right, but she's grinding out the challenges.

7. Wardog is playing a Trumpian game. He’s incompetent, but pushes forward with relentless aggression. It hasn’t yet been worth it for anyone to stand up to him, so he's been getting his way.  But he isolates himself with erratic, paranoid decisionmaking, haphazardly ejecting his closest allies. He destroys most of what he touches and won't be able to win a final vote without cheating.

6. Lauren was an energetic player her first week or so in Fiji, but her vitality has waned. The lost challenges, endless tribals and lack of food drained Lauren's lifeforce, and Wentworth's ouster leaves her friendless. She has nothing to pin her hopes on, and could actually slip below zero points for the season if she misplays her idol.

5. Gavin hasn't made much of an impression, but neither had last season's champ Nick up to this point. Gavin resembles Nick in many ways, but his game isn't as whimsical or as inspired. Gavin appeared to be a ringleader early, or at least to dwell within the ring of leadership. Recently he's been an afterthought. He'd be wise to reunite with Victoria and soak up passengers like Aurora and Lauren to retake control of the game.

4. Ron has some annoying attributes, but he plays alright. An assessment of his game doesn't reveal anything particularly distinguishing, but there's enough acumen/fortitude/sociability here to defeat a relatively weak cast of opponents.

3. Rick has done it all. He's forged alliances and broken them. He's lost a dozen challenges and won individual immunity. He's tipped tribal council, been voted out, lived on the Edge of Extinction and rejoined the game. He's played astutely, lost his bearings and rediscovered them. With all the larger alliances and voting blocks disassembled, Rick has the social skills to maneuver his way to Final Tribal.

2. Julie has lost her wits on occasion, but generally plays with balance and rationale. She's got something cooking with Ron, an alliance that could potentially go the distance. 

1. Victoria was the Mob Boss early on, but has been bumped over to riding shotgun. She's accepted her demotion with humility, but you know she's keeping a list of adversaries she'll eventually take revenge on, Arya-style. Having endured a winter of loneliness without perishing, Victoria may now be ready to regain her seat at the head of the table.

Standings:

Eric - "Eric" - 121.5 pts

Eric - 23

David - 17.5

Gavin - 13

Wentworth - 18

Julie - 21

Aurora - 29 

It was a catastrophic hour for Big Eric, who lost two strong returning players in dubious fashion. Perhaps the lead story of the season so far is returning players misplaying idols. First Aubry got bamboozled with an idol in her pocket, then David used his one vote before he actually needed it, then Wentworth pulled an Aubry. It was an embarrassing exit for the veteran, who had played arguably her strongest game before exiting ignominiously. Barring an upset return from the Edge, this should be the last we ever see of Wentworth.

Doug & Bri - "Well, That Sucked" - 110.5 pts

Rick - 12.5

Chris - 13

Chris - 13

Ron - 12

Aurora - 29

Julia - 31 

Terrific episode for B&D, as they won both immunity challenges and watched their greatest rivals lose a key player to the Edge. Their team would morph into the pool's strongest if Chris was able to return from the Edge. If not, they need Rick + Ron to outscore Gavin + Julie by ten points to beat Eric.

Baggins - "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a [redacted]" - 102 pts

Joe - 29

Eric - 23

Lauren - 3

Ron - 12

Julie - 21

Aubry - 14

Ron and Julie appear to be the strongest alliance left in the game. They also seem to have an element of control over the stretch, as their middling position gives them access to the fates of the remaining castaways. Should this duo remain allied and navigate their way to Final Tribal, they could spearhead the storybook victory Baggins (given just a 9% chance of victory one week ago) deserves.

Ben & Michal - "The Hammer" - 93 pts

Joe - 29

Lauren - 3

Wentworth - 18

Victoria - 7

Julia - 31

Wardog - 5

Prospects have dimmed to a flicker for the Greenbergs. Their three players who haven't been ousted have combined to score an anemic 15 points. Wardog won't be winning while Lauren and Victoria don't have much current footing or challenge potential. 

Moon & Melissa - "Nerdy White Dudes" - 69 pts

Rick - 12.5

David - 17.5

Gavin - 13

Victoria - 7

Wardog - 5

Aubry - 14

With the most remaining players and the most remaining competent players, the MoonBee has hope for another epic comeback. The deficit is a concerning 52 pts, but keep in mind each player voted out will immediately receive an escalating jury bonus starting at 18 pts.

Edge of Extinction: Episode Nine

The Kama Tribe has now fractured fully, or at least to the point where we can disregard tribal affiliation in our evaluations of the remaining castaways. Some bonds remain, but with Kama now having voted out three of its own in consecutive weeks, it's clear players are now fully focused on individual resumé-building. We'll examine each castaway's prospects next week. This week we'll take a snapshot of the teams and recklessly estimate their chances of winning the pool.


Standings:

Baggins "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a [redacted]" - 104 pts
Joe - 29
Eric - 23
Lauren - 4
Ron - 13
Julie - 21
Aubry - 14
It looked like a revenge tour season for Baggins, but his prospects have soured. He's down to three players, Lauren isn't doing jack and Ron & Julie were recent victims of a backstabbing. Bag does have hope that one of his players could return from the Edge and garner some late points, but he'll need Team Eric to pop some leaks soon to have any shot.
Chances of winning: 9%

Doug & Bri - "Well, That Sucked" - 99.5 pts
Rick - 6.5
Chris - 13
Chris - 13
Ron - 13
Aurora - 23
Julia - 31
This sad squad drafted two self-destruction artists - one of them twice. Pitiful as Chris's immolation was, Julia's was even more spectacular. Those meltdowns leave Doug & Bri with recently-imploded Rick, uninspiring Ron and abysmal Aurora. Not exactly the Moses this long-suffering duo needs to guide them to the Promised Land.
Chances of winning: 7%

Eric - "Eric" - 90.5 pts
Eric - 23
David - 1.5
Gavin - 13
Wentworth - 9
Julie - 21
Aurora - 23
Big Eric Schwartz is tied for the most players left, has easily the two highest-scoring surviving players and another who's tied for third and sits in third place in the pool behind two teams with three players left. Schwartz is a solid favorite to win the pool right now with four savvy players plus high-scoring Aurora.
Chances of winning: 54%

Michal & Ben - "The Hammer" - 86 pts
Joe - 29
Lauren - 4
Wentworth - 9
Victoria - 8
Julia - 31
Wardog - 5
The loss of Julia leaves the Greenbergs with four single-digit points earners. Victoria is a cold-blooded strategist and Wentworth is playing a gritty game, but Lauren is a passenger and Wardog is woeful. The man is averaging just more than half a point per episode. Victoria may be the best player in the game, but The Hammer may have trouble garnering points around her.
Chances of winning: 14%

MoonBee - "Nerdy White Dudes" - 48 pts
Rick - 6.5
David - 1.5
Gavin - 13
Victoria - 8
Wardog - 5
Aubry - 14
Incorrectly playing an idol calls for a 5 point deduction in our pool. I gave David & Rick -2.5 each for unnecessarily playing their joint idol this week. With so many idols and advantages in play, I don't remember if they were forced to play it this episode. Remind me if they were and comment if you don't think -2.5 is fair. If this is correct, it drops David to a miniscule 1.5 points on the season. This team appears as strong as Eric's, but trails him by 42 points. That's a lot of ground to make up, especially with a couple redundant players.
Chances of winning: 16%

Survivor Extinction: Episodes 7 & 8

For the record, I don't really know how to keep score of this season. I am open to suggestions! Here's what I did: Keith & Wendy lost points for being 1st and 2nd out of the game respectively. Everyone else is now gaining jury points. I intend to take those points away & turn them into negative points should anyone quit at this point. However, I don't see that happening. Not now that they have twice as much of a reason to stay - jury vote plus a chance to get back into the game. but let me know what you think.

Now, back to the show itself - here's some notes from Ep 7:

• The Kama Six decided to vote out Joe perhaps a little prematurely. Maybe they felt safe doing so with the Lesu alliance in apparent shambles. But they cut Aurora out of the decision & now there's a Kama Six and six other players who may or may not band together. That kind of showdown would be a welcome addition to this season.
• Did anyone else get the impression that Joe was (maybe subconsciously) hoping to get voted out? He's been failing at the social game & knew he was on the outs. He might have decided that he'd have an easier time of it living on the Edge instead of in the thick of the strategic & social game. And quite frankly he might be right. Just sit on the sidelines, don't stress about providing for everyone else, and then crush it in one epic challenge & you're back in the game with just a couple challenges to go. He'll probably get less food but he'll also put his body under a lot less stress....
• And finally, Wentworth and David need to recognize that Kama has gone 2 for 2 in targeting & eliminating veteran players. If Wentworth doesn't read the writing on the wall & play an idol next episode (or at minimum seriously consider it) then it's her own fault.

And here's some thoughts on Ep 8:

• Rick thinks he's the shit and he's far from it. No one ever goes around stating blatant hatred for other people in the game & has a chance to win. Last person to do this I think was Abi Maria & we know what kind of player she was. I now want this guy to go down in flames & am extremely grateful I didn't get him on my team.  This last tribal council was a good start.
• Overall I loved the strategy in this episode. The game is afoot! It seems like alliance/voting blocks might be back on the table for the season, which would be an excellent turn of events.
• Obviously I'm highly biased based on my team roster, but I do love watching Wentworth & David converse like the veterans they are, giving an accurate assessment of their situation & coming up with successful strategies to improve their lot. What could be more masterful, really?

The Teams:

Baggins "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a Pro" - 104 pts

• Joe (29 pts)
• Eric (23 pts)
• Lauren (4 pts)
• Ron (13 pts)
• Julie (21 pts)
• Aubry (14 pts)

Eric "Eric" - 87 pts

• Eric (23 pts)
• David (4 pts)
• Gavin (7 pts)
• Wentworth (9 pts)
• Julie (21 pts)
• Aurora (23 pts)

Doug & Bri "Well, That Sucked" - 87 pts

• Rick (9 pts)
• Chris (13 pts)
• Chris (13 pts)
• Ron (13 pts)
• Aurora (23 pts)
• Julia (16 pts)

Michal & Ben "The Hammer" - 71 pts

• Joe (16 pts)
• Lauren (4 pts)
• Wentworth (9 pts)
• Victoria (8 pts)
• Julia (16 pts)
• Wardog (5 pts)

MoonBee "Nerdy White Dudes" - 47 pts

• Rick (9 pts)
• David (4 pts)
• Gavin (7 pts)
• Victoria (8 pts)
• Wardog (5 pts)
• Aubry (14 pts)

Power Rankings:

1. Eric - Eric may have lost his namesake (or whatever the opposite version of that is) but this is still a team of players - both strategists & physical threats. I'm a fan.

2. Michal & Ben - I didn't think Julia was going to be a big player, but hopefully this episode is the start of her crafty reign. Great resume builder & hopefully her core 3 stay true to each other moving forward. Wardog is a huge disappointment - I thought he'd be a minimum a physical threat rather than an anchor - but otherwise this crew is doing decently well.

3. Baggins - Baggins lost Joe and Eric in back-to-back episodes & now there's trouble abrewing for this once beastly team. Lauren, Ron, and Julie will not rake in the points while he's stronger players languish on the Edge. He needs a chance for a comeback from one of them soon, but I'm not expecting that will happen until there are maybe 5 people left.

4. MoonBee - I'm struggling to understand how MoonBee's team, with 5 players still in the mix, is scoring so low. But these are just not challenge contenders, and this otherwise solid team will likely pay the price for it. Maybe things will turn around though if the strongest physical players get voted out...

5. Doug & Bri - Rick & Ron are in a precarious position, Chris is in purgatory, and Aurora is a fool. Having Julia, a long shot at this point, is not enough.

DoW:

Joe for Ep 7, Rick for Ep 8. I'm throwing a lot of hate towards the top overall picks this go-round.

Survivor Extinction: Ep 4, 5, and 6

"I go to rocks for my people." - David

With a 2 hr extravaganza & a belated blog there's much to cover! But I'm probably not going to because all I want to talk about is the utter dysfunction that is the Edge of Extinction. I'm fascinated by the bitterness and vile [cit. Battlestar Galactica] combined with the mental... fragility, shall we say? There's a reason that losing chefs castaways have not been invited back before. Previous seasons are the better for not including this twist. All the same, I'm excited to see it in action.

Next week we get to see what happens with these Losers, right? Do you think they'll weed out all the current Losers (I'm seriously just going to call them that from now you. And you can't say I'm wrong....) and then start with a fresh batch & then bring 1 person back one last time maybe when they're down to 4-5 players? How will know the Edge of Extinction exists change the way the merged players will compete?

The Teams:

Baggins "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a Pro" - 58 pts

• Joe (16 pts)
• Eric (7 pts)
• Lauren (4 pts)
• Ron (14 pts)
• Julie (15 pts)
• Aubry (2 pts)

Eric "Eric" - 57 pts

• Eric (7 pts)
• David (4 pts)
• Gavin (7 pts)
• Wentworth (9 pts)
• Julie (15 pts)
• Aurora (15 pts)

Michal & Ben "The Hammer" - 53 pts

• Joe (16 pts)
• Lauren (4 pts)
• Wentworth (9 pts)
• Victoria (6 pts)
• Julia (14 pts)
• Wardog (4 pts)

Doug & Bri "Well, That Sucked" - 49 pts

• Rick (2 pts)
• Chris (2 pts)
• Chris (2 pts)
• Ron (14 pts)
• Aurora (15 pts)
• Julia (14 pts)

MoonBee "Nerdy White Dudes" - 25 pts

• Rick (2 pts)
• David (4 pts)
• Gavin (7 pts)
• Victoria (6 pts)
• Wardog (4 pts)
• Aubry (2 pts)

Power Rankings:

1. Eric - David might be literally shaky standing on Wardog's shoulders but I think he's a beast heading into the merge. His quote above gave me shivers. Perfection, man. Lesu members might look like they're in trouble but I have a feeling these veterans have a couple tricks up their sleeves. Gavin & Eric are great competitors too. 

2. Baggins - Losing Aubry early with an idol in her pocket is a big blow to this otherwise beastly team. But could she make it back onto the show? If so will she be able to bring back her idol & extra vote too? A burnt Aubry full of secret advantages could be a dangerous & exciting twist to the game if she can get back into the thick of things.

3. Michal & Ben - Victoria impressed me a lot this episode. She might not have come off like a very nice person, but being able to play Aubry like her own personal fiddle was a huge coup and I think is a testament to her potential to run this game. We've got a lot of Lesu players & veterans, but they've been able to overcome some pretty tough odds up to now, so I think this team still has a good shot. 

4. MoonBee - MoonBee is probably down 2 players & despite having  a team I really like, I think they won't be able to overcome their current point deficit. Too much overlap with Hammer/Eric teams to likely be able to cobble together a winning combo of castaways. 

5. Doug & Bri - If Chris gets back in the game then this team could have a chance. But it looks like Keith will do everything he takes to prevent that from happening, so..... tough luck this season guys.

DoW:

Are Edge of Extinction players eligible? Because it's Reem all the way for me. 

Survivor Extinction: Draft & E3

Survivor Pool Season 38 aka The Edge of Extinction is already being touted as potentially the most well-drafted and competitive season of the pool yet. I'm excited to see how things pan out! Here's some early press/quotes:

"I have no shit to talk." - Moon

"Having fewer blondes this season helped me remember who was who during the draft, and focus on what's really important; drafting players with my name." - Eric

"Seriously? Survivor is still making new seasons?" - Random Co-Worker

"Jeff Probst & I use the same anti-aging hyperbaric chamber company. I highly recommend them to anyone attempting to stop the aging process." - Mike Krzyzskewski

"Wendy is my kind of crazy." - Mark the Chicken

The Teams:

MegaDregs "The Undraftable" - 4 pts

• Keith (0 pts)
• Keith (0 pts)
• Reem (0 pts)
• Reem (0 pts)
• Wendy (2 pts)
• Wendy (2 pts)

Michal & Ben "The Hammer" - 13 pts

• Joe (3 pts)
• Lauren (2 pts)
• Wentworth (2 pts)
• Victoria (2 pts)
• Julia (2 pts)
• Wardog (2 pts)

Doug & Bri "Well, That Sucked" - 13 pts

• Rick (2 pts)
• Chris (2 pts)
• Chris (2 pts)
• Ron (2 pts)
• Aurora (3 pts)
• Julia (2 pts)

Eric "Eric" - 16 pts

• Eric (3 pts)
• David (2 pts)
• Gavin (3 pts)
• Wentworth (2 pts)
• Julie (3 pts)
• Aurora (3 pts)

MoonBee "Nerdy White Dudes" - 18 pts

• Rick (2 pts)
• David (2 pts)
• Gavin (3 pts)
• Victoria (2 pts)
• Wardog (2 pts)
• Aubry (7 pts)

Baggins "Using My Rage Over Last Season to Draft Like a Pro" - 20 pts

• Joe (3 pts)
• Eric (3 pts)
• Lauren (2 pts)
• Ron (2 pts)
• Julie (3 pts)
• Aubry (7 pts)

The Draft:

There's not a lot to criticize, really. The draft was quick, professional, and kind of badass.

• I think Doug & Bri were the only team to double-draft a player, Chris. Survivor Gods insta-punished this decision by ousting Chris & effectively eliminating this team from contention. (Unless this Edge of Extinction twist gets people back in play much faster than I'm anticipating...)
• I'm a little surprised no one drafted Wendy just to go against the chalk (am I using that phrase correctly?). Before last night's episode I was regretting the decision not to do so myself. Then I saw the "next time on Survivor" and slept like a baby.

Power Rankings:

1. MoonBee - I think the nerdy white dudes are in the driver's seat this season. MoonBee stacked the Rick/David duo while I stacked their competition with Wentworth/Lauren. Should be an interesting & exciting show-down!

2. Baggins - I'm also a fan of Bag's draft. Ron & Julie could both go really far - those were savvy late-round pick ups. Aubry coming in strong with an idol find in her dreg position doesn't hurt either.

3. Michal & Ben - We themed toward drafting returning players, which might seem risky but they do tend to last longer than what the early threats against them would indicate. Not sure if it'll pay off, but I like the combo of returnees/muscle & (hopefully) crafty new chicks.

4. Eric - Eric doesn't know who Aurora is, and I don't know who Eric is. I might have been confusing him with Chris? I'm looking at his pic right now & can't remember him, which isn't a great sign. I also think Gavin went a smidge high in the draft (but seriously not by much), which is another reason I'm ranking this team a little lower. Overall still a really strong team.

5. Doug & Bri - Doug & Bri were probably watching last night & feeling pretty great. Chris played the role of Hero in the reward challenge, he's building connections with everyone. The only names being tossed around are Wentworth  & Wendy. And then that dope decides he has to play a game honestly where the entire strategy  is based on deception. They still have a sliver of hope, though - there doesn't seem to be a huge amount of overlap with their remaining team & anyone else's, so you might still have a magic combination of players.


Douche of the Week:

Wendy. I can't even

Survivor DG: Finale

COME ON IN, GUYS! - BEN/PROBST

Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! - John Oliver

I'm not sure what's going on? - Paul Wasicka

The finale episode of Survivor's David v. Goliath did not disappoint. Though I realize this blog post might because:

1) it's well after the finale episode actually aired (though that might make it right on time for teh bagginses),

2) Moon's emailed barb did not go unnoticed (email Moon, really? That is soooo early 2000s of you), and

3) I'm attempting to respond within Moon's milieu(s) (hint: ....nah, you don't need it):

Here's a graphic for you, titled "Moon"*

The pool this season looked to be a runaway [citation: Moon's previous blog]. But in a move that can only be qualified as "Classic Bag," team Bagdrea squandered a massive lead to lose to MoonBee after a devastating Monopoly card was played by Nick for (and this is true) "all possible earnable Survivor pool points." (Two sheep for a brick ain't got nothing on buying development cards.)

I've never seen a point-earning sprint like Nick went on, outside of Gendry's improbable run to the Wall.  Nick earned all but 14 of his 91 points in the last episode alone, which I'd hazard to say is some kind of record as far as percentage of points earned within 1 episode [citation: that's 85% but tbh I had to use a calculator to figure that out #mathishard]. And now, this:**

Frequently Asked Questions:
If you're so bad at math, why are you running this very math-based blog?
As with most things on the internet, it's less a matter of "are you the most qualified?" and more a matter of "are you the most motivated?"

How can we better address unexpected twists/advantages ad-libbed by this amazing show?
Well, you could trust the blogmaster to make ad-lib decisions herself, but that seems highly inadvisable given the obviously biased nature of this pool. Instead, I'd propose that any blog commenter could throw out a suggested rule/point allotment for any such unexpected twist/advantage. Should that new rule be approved by a blog quorum (let's say 4 people assuming that I, Phil, Eric, Moon, Doug, Ben, and a Pickett regularly read a blog post within 1 week & we're looking for a majority).

Why is Eric so bad at this pool?
Eric's blatant blondeism kept him out of the hundred club this season, but he would have come in dead last this season whether he'd double-drafted Kara or not. Eric's primary flaws when it comes to the Survivor pools are as follows:

1. Not knowing Survivor history. While I applaud Eric's involvement in the #MeToo movement, knowing that only 15% of hidden idols are found by women might have altered his drafting decision to take only women this season. [Note: not saying that I knew that stat either, but I like to think that I understood it on a subliminal level.]
2. Lack of organization. If you could just list out your thoughts/rankings more cohesively, I think you might be better able to strategize when it comes to the draft. I know that the 8 hr time difference between CO & NJ is brutal, but you have to take that into account if you're committed to this pool 
3. He drank pond water 
4. Math?

If CBS ever tried to pull a 'Great British Baking Show Host Hostile Takeover' of Probst's role in Survivor, how would you respond?
Not well. Worst possible successor would be Carson Daly who would result in me never watching the show again. Probably most anyone else between Probst and Daly would keep me watching the show, but this blog would be heavily laced with bitter diatribe and occasionally open hostility.

Does a Bag comment ever contain more than 3 sentences?
No. No it does not. Sigh.

Why does Moon think I should feel embarrassed?
I get that I panned Moon's team early this season but LONG ago admitted that Mike was one of the players to beat in this season & that John exceeded expectations. I also disagreed with Moon's power rankings in the previous blog post & said that he underrated Nick. Embarrassed? Hardly. Are you?

What did Phil cook for dinner last night?
DraftKings gives it 50% chance that it was a pasta dish, 20% that it contained fish, and 5% that it was vegetarian.

Will next season be as good as this season?
Unlikely. Though I'm always a fan of any season with returning castaways, Malcolm Joe has never been one of my favorites. I'm a fan of Aubry (Aubrey?), but have never learned to spell her name. I remember likely Kelley Wentworth but couldn't say why. And David was great his season but should come in with a massive target on his back. So I guess I'm feeling lukewarm towards last season while still am coming off hot from this last season. High bar here, guys, I hope you vets deliver.



*No, Mom, I am not going to provide a key/legend to the above image. Figure this one out on your own... or ask a GOT friend/fan who is not this here blogmaster/daughter.

**I'm kind of assuming Moon is a John Oliver fan, but couldn't say for sure. I honestly consider any opportunity a good one in which to throw in John Oliver references.