Sunday, December 18, 2016

XvM: Finale

 The finale was a fitting end to what was an entertaining & largely unpredictable season. This is twice now that we've fallen into the Survivor producers' trap though - last season Aubry was a dreg pick because of a panic attack, and this season Hannah was a dreg for the exact same reason. Both made it to the finals, though neither won. If someone has a panic attack at the start of next season - extremely unlikely - they should be the #1 draft pick.

 I feel like Adam's strategy this whole season was to be completely unpredictable & unreliable, which is weirdly what he accused Hannah of being as a negative in Final Tribal. But look at his play throughout the season: the Millennials largely didn't trust him in the beginning because he kept flip-flopping between the weirdos & the cool kids. Next he turned on FigTayls & sided with Ken & Jess. Then he reunited with Zeke only to turn on him again. He was blunt in a socially awkward way, and he seemed to abuse the weird relationship he had with Jay. Why Jay likes this guy after being repeatedly backstabbed by him, I'll never know!

But he did seem to wear his heart on his sleeve & he used his "you can steal a reward" advantage skillfully... for this season. If he tried to do the same in the next season against a slew of pros, he'd probably be taken out immediately. He could also argue being a competitor in challenges. All in all, not the greatest victor in Survivor history, but not the worst either.

Who are the worst Survivor winners in the history of the show? Here's my top 5, starting with the worst of the worst:

  1. Chris from Vanuatu
  2. Fabio
  3. Brian, the used car salesman
  4. Jenna Morasca
  5. Michelle from last season

Overall I think the pool of winners has actually been quite strong. Looking back at it in my History tab in the spreadsheet, I definitely remember being upset at some of the people who have been declared victors in moment & thinking they didn't deserve it. But after enough time, they mostly all had solid strategies that were just plain better than some of their competitors.

This was a much smarter group than most all-newbie seasons. And a well-deserved win for Moon & Melissa, who put together a team where everyone earned a minimum of 30 points.

In the end, I was actually rooting for Hannah. Hannah, you may not have won a million dollars, but you did turn this very critical fan 180 degrees. I thought her FT argument was really solid & am honestly surprised she didn't get any votes. Was it too little too late? Did she lay low & act like a coattail rider for too long? Or did she just piss too many people off by not turning against David sooner in the game?


The Teams:

MoonBee "Hannah & the Homeboys" - 180 points 
  1. Chris - 24 pts
  2. Adam - 89 pts
  3. Will - 33 pts
  4. Hannah - 34 pts
Baggadocious "DK Double Stacker" - 152 points
  1. Ken - 56 pts
  2. David - 59 pts
  3. Figgy - 7 pts
  4. Taylor - 30 pts
Michal & Ben "Sea Dogs" - 82 points
  1. Zeke - 33 pts
  2. Jay - 41 pts
  3. Michaela - 14 pts
  4. Paul - -6 pts
Doug & Bri "The Real Housewives of Fiji (and Bret)" - 71 points
  1. Michelle - 25 pts
  2. Bret - 31 pts
  3. Jessica - 18 pts
  4. Lucy - -3 pts
Dregs "Dreggy McBoatface" - 27 points
  1. CeCe - -2 pts
  2. Sunday - 29 pts

Prop Bets:


-->
People involvedCastaways InvolvedMethod of measurementStakesAnd the winner is...
Melissa v. DougHannah v. LucyLongevity1 drinkMelissa
Doug v. BagBag's entire teamDown to 0-1 players before any other team1 drinkBag
Ben v. MoonMichaela v. Chris3:2 LongevitydrinksMoon
Ben v. BagMichaela v. FiggyLongevity1 drinkBen
Moon v. BagChris & Adam v. Ken & DavidLongevity1 drink + 1 bonus drink if both players are gone before the other team loses anyoneBag
Ben v. BagZeke & Michaela v. Ken & DavidLongevity1 drink + 1 bonus drink if both players are gone before the other team loses anyoneBag + Bonus
Michal v. Doug & Moon & MelissaFiggy & TaylorAre they still a couple by the reunion show1 drinkMoon & Melissa
Michal & Bag v. Bri & MoonMillenials v. GenXtotal points between all players (by draft)1 drinkMichal & Bag
Ben/Michal v. MoonSea Dogs v. HHtotal points of each team$50 bottle o' boozeMoon


Next Season:

I'm so excited!! It's 20 returning castaways & the cast is chock full of past winners, fan faves, schemers, and loony tunes - I think you already know who I'm talking about. Here's the break-down:

Past winners:
  • Sandra - the only 2x winner, she's risking her current inarguable position of being the greatest Survivor of all time by coming back for a 3rd try. 
  • Tony - the cop who made paranoid flip-flopping a winning strategy.
  • JT - one of my personal favorites ever since he won me the pool in his first season. Also known for being the fool who secretly shipped Evil Russell an immunity idol across tribal lines based on a completely inaccurate hunch.
The fan faves:
  • Malcolm - aka the Original Manbun. #Thisismyteamnameifweendupdraftinghim
  • Ozzy - Needs no introduction - this will be his FOURTH season of Survivor. Dare I say it? Past his prime?
  • Cirie - also her FOURTH season! These two must love pain. I do love Cirie, she's uber crafty. Unfortunately so is everyone else this season.
  • Caleb - medevacked 2 seasons ago, he was probably a shoo-in for the next returning castaways season. He was a strong competitor & had a big heart. 
  • Tai - Caleb's return wouldn't be complete without his opposites-attract bro-mate! The real question, though: will Mark the Chicken also make a comeback?
The schemers:
  • Andrea - I think she lost her first season because she only played the "I'm hot, take me along for the ride" strategy. Then she over-schemed on her second outing. It will be interesting to see how she plays it her third time around.
  • Aubry - the runner-up from 2 seasons ago. I think we all unanimously (except maybe Doug & Bri) agreed she was the deserving winner, but she wasn't quite able to pull it off 
  • Jeff Varner - Probst's perennial favorite. He seemed like an over-schemer his 2nd time back to Survivor, but then pulled it together & was looking to be a real threat. Then he got injured, which I think was just enough of a reason for his tribe to vote him out.
  • Michaela - challenge beast that was voted out when she proved that she was quite clever too
  • Zeke - not announced on the Reunion show, but I've seen multiple sources now that list him as a returning player. Perhaps he came in off the waitlist? 
  • Ciera - the woman who will never be able to live down that she voted her mom off the show.
  • Sarah Lacina - the cop who made a "Cops 4eva!" deal with Tony & then got insta-backstabbed. I'm excited to see her back, I think she'll do well on a season of veterans. And now she knows about Tony, so there's no fear of "he's a cop, he must be honest" bias kicking in this time. 
  • Troyzan - yeah. They brought this guy back. I know that I'm merging my memories of him with his co-star Tarzan, which is certainly not helpful for him. But I'm just not going to get over this name. Actually, the more I think about it, I think he was taken out by a combo of the powerhouse-that-was-Kim and the insanity-that-was-Colton, but had been quite strong before that. 
And these guys:
  • Debbie - my all-time fave loony tunes... after Philip Jessum Herring, that is. Debbie may have a redemption story akin to Coach's, or she may prove to us that she's already reached her ceiling when it comes to Survivor. And what about her Red Lobster ceiling? Her chemistry ceiling? Her competitive juggling ceiling?
  • Brad Culpepper - universally hated in his season, but for the life of me I can't remember why! His wife was a challenge beast & paranoid coattail-rider who long outlasted my memory of him. 
  • Sierra - from Worlds Apart, she came in 5th, but I BARELY remember her. She's from Texas, yes? Maybe a beauty queen? 
  • Hali - also from Worlds Apart, and I also remember her only vaguely, though I seem to think she's a stronger player than Sierra.


5 comments:

Margot said...

Can't wait for the next season! Y'all should have a lot of fun picking teams!

GnightMoon said...

Excellent season. I tend to agree with your sentiments on Adam. It's hard not to respect his game since he got every vote. Yet at times it seemed like he bungled things. He misplayed an idol at least once. He confided in Father Taylor and was immediately betrayed. The steal-a-reward thing ended up working out for him beautifully, but I don't know if it was due to his mental prowess or just luck. I thought he had a good take when asked on his contribution to the strategic evolution of the game: that he made sure to bring bigger targets than himself to the final six to "shield" him down to final three. I don't know if this was genius or just the way it worked out. I think he still would have won without revealing his mom was dying of cancer at Final Tribal, but hanging onto that until Final Tribal was the perfect way to "play" it.

So Ken waited to turn on David until the final vote, then got zero votes himself at Final Tribal. Yet I feel like it was the right decision. He had no way of knowing Adam would drop the mom cancer bomb, and David would likely have gotten more votes than Ken. It seems very likely David would have won (and maybe swept himself) if he went to Final Tribal with Hannah and Ken.

Hannah's game was discounted like that of other strategic female players over the years. It's interesting to see this societal problem manifested in Survivor. It seemed to me Adam & Hannah played similar strategic games, often working together, yet Hannah got none of the credit. Chris even gave a speech about why Adam should win, citing his ability to convince Ken to vote off David... when it appeared it was actually Hannah who did the convincing!

Tricky edit this season. Early on it appeared David's only hope was to ride superstar Ken's coattails...but by the end it was Ken who was the afterthought, the android body to David's Krang. Hannah was invisible for a large stretch of the early to mid-game but emerged as something of a strategic mastermind in the late game, and it seemed like she always was, it just wasn't being shown. Will might have gotten less than five seconds of screen time in early episodes, yet was a central character in later ones. Big guns like Michaela and Zeke were sent packing before the endgame. I think we read too much into it.

Agree with your bottom 5 winners...except for the weakest winner ever, Natalie White, who if I recall correctly did absolutely nothing but ride Evil Russell's coattails till the end. Then she won it Trump-style because no one wanted to vote for Russell.

Big season for second round picks - each one outscored the first-rounder on their team.

Very excited for next season. Should be epic. It doesn't start until March apparently? Are we going to get Survivor in June? Because that would be so much better than the Bachelorette. You have 22 listed, which would be cool, though you said 20. In any case, I'm looking forward to it already.

Thanks to Pickett for running the blog and the pool! Let us know if there's anything we can do to help out next season.

Bag said...

Solid review by Moon. I love the Krang reference. gg, gg, etc.

Michal Greenberg said...

Moon, I seriously considered Natalie White but in the end conclued that she played it perfectly considering Evil Russ' strategy & temperament. She knew there was a bull in the china shop & adjusted accordingly. It'd be interesting to see her on another season, I'd like to see what she'd do.

TheGraveWolf said...

I also found myself warming to Hannah in the last few episodes and especially during her final tribal appearance. She made a good case for why she was deserving.

Adam bungled his way to a glorious jury sweep. Well done Adam and well done MoonBee, the 'worst drafted team' (hyuck hyuck).

Your top 5 least deserving winners included some real stinkers but I didn't think Brian Heidik deserved to be on the list. I remember him owning his season. However, after reading over a recap of that season, I realized I am wrong and it was closer than I thought. He did make a great play in taking the more hated Clay with him to the FT where it was just the two of them. He won 4-3 over Clay and 2 of the votes for him were because he was the 'lesser or two evils'.

I learned two other things from my Survivor research.

1. Brian Heidik also does softcore porn with his wife and goes by the name Brian Roth.

2. I should not question your historical Survivor knowledge.

Excited to be on your team for this next season of Survivor!