Survivor Ghost Island: Finale

It’s the finale & no one is more excited the Probst. It’s either because he’s completely in his element on live TV, or because he’s relieved this rather dull season is nearly over. The Ghost Island concept I think could’ve been a great one if it had been a cannier cast.

Wendell is probably the smartest person left on the island, and is coming into the finale as the favorite to win. But that also makes him the biggest target. Then Dom & Wendell start talking about how Sea Bass is the biggest threat left and I’m once again reminded of the inferiority of this season. Terrible judgment!!

The next immunity + reward challenge is a maze with what looks to be a tricky puzzle. Whoever wins this is getting themselves a hefty 10 points (or 20 points for a double stack), and it definitely feels like the Survivor Pool this season is closer than it's been in recent memory.

Wendell wins – woot! – and he takes the dregs with him to reward. Smart move, though I think it was craftier than how far Wendell thought it through. After all, keeping Donathan isolated from talking to the dregs is a pretty important decision.

Then we get to watch Angela be included in a strategic plan for the first time ever, and then we instantly get to see why folks never did so before now – because she can’t keep her mouth shut. Great editing, and a hilarious scene.

Tribal council is painful on a lot of levels… bro. The blitzkrieg of idols both real & fake was an obvious front to scare people away from voting out Dom. And sadly it totally worked. Such a n00b mistake, Sea Bass.

Next day & it’s a new challenge but with the same result – Wendell wins again. Then Dom makes one of the worst poker analogies in Survivor history by claiming that “a snap call is usually a bluff.” Yeah sure. Hopefully he’s at one of y’alls tables at the WSOP this year and he will snap call all his chips your way.

There was some grandstanding at tribal but nothing super interesting. Idols were played to no avail and Donathan was sent to the jury.

Dom ended up winning immunity & it was fun to see the respect between Dom & Wendell play out as they both knew long ago that they didn’t want to take the other one to final but had so much fun playing together that they just couldn’t help themselves.

Somehow looking at urns where past contestants messed up in the 11^th hour inspired Dom to consider the unthinkable – give up his immunity idol to play for fire against Wendell. He claims it would make him a legend in a good way. I think it would have made him a legend more a la Eric.

Fortunately Dom’s not that stupid (though he was dumb enough to sacrifice Angela to a fire challenge). Even though the decisions were not well made, it feels like the 3 most deserving players (since Michael went home) have made it to the finals, so I can make my peace with that.

MVP of final tribal is far & away Michael. He would have CRUSHED IT arguing his own case if he hadn’t been voted out! Bring him back soon, Probst, I want to see that guy playing against the likes of Sarah, Parvati, Boston Rob, and Cochran. He could hold his own. I think Laurel did a good job of arguing her case and that Dom & Wendell both did a bad job of arguing their cases. And yet she got no votes!!

For the first time in Survivor history…. There’s a tie! Ultimately Wendell’s loyalty to Laurel pays off huge, and I feel a massive sense of vindication at picking the ultimate winner #1 overall. So many doubters out there, but it turns out I’m more than just a blogger. I actually know my stuff too. J

The Teams:

Michal & Ben: 203 points

• Wendell (94 pts)
• Jenna (19 pts)
• Laurel (46pts)
• Sebastian (32 pts)
• Desiree (12 pts)

Bagginses: 193 points

• Stephanie (-5 pts)
• Wendell (94 pts)
• Libby (26 pts)
• Laurel (46 pts)
• Donathan (32 pts)

Phil: 156 points

• Brendan (-6 pts)
• Dom (80 pts)
• Dom (80 pts)
• Bradley (1 pts)
• Bradley (1 pts)

Eric: 150 points

• Michael (32 pts)
• Michael (32 pts)
• Angela (37 pts)
• Angela (37 pts)
• Desiree (12 pts)

SuperDreg: 118 points

• Chelsea (33 pts)
• Chris (26 pts)
• Chelsea (33 pts)
• Chris (26 pts)

Doug & Bri: 87 points

• Stephanie (-5 pts)
• Sebastian (32 pts)
• Donathan (32 pts)
• Kellyn (22 pts)
• James (6 pts)

MoonBee: 67 points

• Brendan (-6 pts)
• Libby (26 pts)
• Kellyn (22 pts)
• Jenna (19 pts)
• James (6 pts)

Next Season:

Next season’s theme of David v. Goliath looks almost as dumb as the new Kevin Hart show. The mixed metaphors of “all Goliaths have Achilles heels” is cringe-worthy as well. Fire that writer, Probst, s/he made you look like a fool!

Sruvivor: New Episode

Whoa, I'm actually almost keeping up with Survivor? Hard to believe!!

But it's Friday night & I can't think of anything better than to sit down with a solid beer (Left Hand Milk Stout) and "live" blog the latest episode of Survivor.

There's 7 left, and Donathan's feelings are very similar to my own from my last blog. He's seriously contemplating ditching play-it-safe Laurel and trying to do something to boost his resume.

In the meantime we have a reward challenge where the reward is being a Survivor Goodwill Ambassador & Kellyn clutches her heart throat in some kind of mimicry of being Mother Theresa rather than admitting that was she actually wants is the fried chicken. I'd probably be all for that if I was on Survivor. I recently learned that I make some seriously badass fried chicken myself (let me know if you want to try it sometime).

They draw for "captains" and the choices are 100% unsurprising. Poor Angela. No one gives her a real chance, including me.

This is the kind of challenge I'd be super pumped to participate in. Kind of mundane, but all about perfecting a process. That's my jam, yo. 33 days in, though, this is pretty grueling.

All 3 teams make it to 4 spools, which was better than I expected. I love that they did this as a team challenge this time around. All about communication, strategy, and heart. Is this my fave challenge ever? Honestly, it might be. Which is well-timed, because I think Moon is right. This is generally a weak season.

Dumbass Seabass & Kellyn are unsurprisingly the first team out, though kudos to them all for making it to 5 spools each. Laurel & Donathan bust immediately afterwards, and Wendell & Dom immediately choose Laurel to share their reward & Dumbass Seabass to go to Ghost Island. The lack of thought behind these choices (and the verbal announcement of the lack of thought) prove that these "masterminds" wouldn't stand a chance against the true geniuses of this show (Parvati, Boston Rob, Cochran, Yau Man, etc. just to name a few.... aaahhhh when are they going to have an All Star season again? I miss the Supreme Metagame!!) .

Back from commercial and Seabass is suddenly some kind of Ghost Island Philosopher. He refers to himself as a... barnacle??... that attaches to a whale. I clearly didn't catch the whole thing, but the gist was spot on and shockingly insightful for someone who appeared to be perma-stoned up until this point. Cap'n Bass wins himself an advantage in the game and even more importantly a little respect from this here blogger.

Now we move on to the "goodwill ambassador" part of the show, and it's mildly uncomfortable as it's borderline racist/classist/American-privilegist but thankfully they don't spend too much time dwelling on the black castaways being good at sports & the "adoring" looks the "brown children" are giving them while they show off their skills.

Donathan's "Truth Bombs" are maybe not something I've been paying too much attention to until the last couple episodes?? He says they've been working for him, but I can't say I've noticed that much of them until recently. In any case, he manages to ostracize most of his primary alliance in about 10 minutes and I failed to see how that helped him in his game. But I'd be happy if Cap'n Bass wasn't the only one to pleasantly surprise me tonight, so fingers crossed there was more to Donathan's strategy than what we just witnessed. Because if he didn't think that through, he just put 2 guys on high alert who were the last 2 people on the island that they wanted to feel insecure.

On to the immunity challenge, and Wendell & Cap'n Bass are going strong while everyone else seems to struggle. But Laurel catches up & in the end it's a weird finish where Wendell actually finishes first but Laurel calls it first & gets the credit. Well done Wendell for bowing out as gracefully as possible. I wonder if he would have done the same if it wasn't Laurel (or Dom) who was the winner.

Back at camp there's an uncomfortable scramble where everyone wants Kellyn gone, but Donathan gets so paranoid that somehow his plans just make himself a giant target rather than help him in any way. Laurel is conspicuously absent throughout all these exchanges, though, and I'm wondering what that means. Is she usually the one that protects him, or reins him in? Then Kellyn refers to Donathan as someone who "pulls the plug on the grenade" and my indignation at Moon referring to me as Kellyn-like intensifies. Seriously man? I'd like to think you have more respect for me than that.

There's some kind of scramble after that, but I'm not really paying attention other than to note that Angela isn't involved in pretty much any of this.

Dom's cryptic speech at tribal was so sketchy that he vilifies himself immediately rather than salvaging the situation. But then Donathan returns fire by doing basically the exact same thing.

Now the question really is, can Seabass use his extra vote when it's down to 5 or even 4 players left? If so, definitely hold on to that advantage -it's HUGE!!

In the end it's a tie between Kellyn & Donathan and strangely it appears that Wendell & Dom didn't give Angela any info as to who she should vote for. Did they talk to the Cap'n either?

Kellyn goes home & next week is the FINALE!!! What a good early birthday present. Kellyn is gone, and the finale is next week!

The Teams:

SuperDreg: 118 points

• [Chelsea (33 pts)]
• [Chris (26 pts)]
• [Chelsea (33 pts)]
• [Chris (26 pts)]

Eric: 110 points

• [Michael (32 pts)]
• [Michael (32 pts)]
• Angela (17 pts)
• Angela (17 pts)
• [Desiree (12 pts)]

Michal & Ben: 99 points

• Wendell (28 pts)
• [Jenna (19 pts)]
• Laurel (26 pts)
• Sebastian (14 pts)
• [Desiree (12 pts)]

Bagginses: 90 points

• [Stephanie (-5 pts)]
• Wendell (28 pts)
• [Libby (26 pts)]
• Laurel (26 pts)
• Donathan (15 pts)

MoonBee: 67 points

• [Brendan (-6 pts)]
• [Libby (26 pts)]
• [Kellyn (22 pts)]
• [Jenna (19 pts)]
• [James (6 pts)]

Phil: 54 points

• [Brendan (-6 pts)]
• Dom (29 pts)
• Dom (29 pts)
• [Bradley (1 pts)]
• [Bradley (1 pts)]

Doug & Bri: 52 points

• [Stephanie (-5 pts)]
• Sebastian (14 pts)
• Donathan (15 pts)
• [Kellyn (22 pts)]
• [James (6 pts)]

Power Rankings:

1. Michal and Ben - Cap'n Bass proved he has a couple moves and Laurel & Wendell met point-earning expectations this episode. That was about as good an episode as we could have hoped for, though it would have been optimal if Donathan had actually gone home. Still, he's in the dog house now and that's better than I expected.
2. Bagginses - Voting out Kellyn rather than Donathan was probably the wrong choice. That being said, that's assuming that the version of Survivor that I'm watching more closely mirrors reality than the version of Survivor that Moon is watching. In that version Kellyn is smart, socially savvy, and maybe has real reasons for divorcing her husband other than a desire to go to grad school... don't get me started. Leaving Donathan in this game leaves a real threat. That dude is smart & has a good story to back it up. Plus his Truth Bombs give him more street cred than Laurel's more subtle (though in my opinion, superior) game play. 
3. Phil - Dom's still here which means Phil's still in this game. I do feel very strange giving a higher ranking to Phil than Eric, given the 50+ difference in their scores up until now. With that being said, Angela lost Eric points this episode, whereas Phil is moving in the right direction... This is clearly flawed logic, but I'm going to stick to my guns & say that Phil has a higher ceiling than Eric this season. 
4. Eric - Angela... what is there really to say? Your performance in the reward challenge was literally absent. Your performance in the immunity challenge was actually worse. 
5. SuperDregs - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5J1mn_u0rM
6. Doug and Bri - There's nothing new really to say. the Cap'n over-performed, and Donathan under-performed. Kellyn met expectations. You won't have to add to the trophy, so that's a plus? Except that Doug is far superior to Moon at adding to the trophy, so really it feels like everyone is losing right now.
7. MoonBee - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qy9_lfjQopU

Douche of the Week:

Donathan!

Survivor Ghost Island: Episodes Many

There's a lot to cover over the last few episodes, but the only thing I can really think about is how annoying Kellyn is. Her emotions are both overblown and feel really inauthentic. Her backstory is the most inexplicable of all the remaining castaways, and her determination to trust her gut has nearly led to disaster multiple times.

Before I spend far too much time dwelling on her, though, let's move on. Since the last blog we've seen the departure of Desiree, a woman who can lie so well it's just plain terrifying. (Also I didn't notice until she made the jury but her breasts are absolutely enormous. Those ladies are all I can see when she's in the frame these days.)

Next to go are Jenna and Michael. Jenna was so forgettable she's lucky I'm even giving her this sentence of space in the blog. But Michael was a blow. He played a really strong game, just ran into some bad luck along the way. Though to be honest someone that burly is always going to have a target on their back. Hopefully we'll see him again soon on an all-stars season!

Finally, Chelsea was the latest casualty in the season. Considering how often the castaways have talked about the men this season being the "strong" players, I'm happy to see that someone finally rightfully targeted the actual strongest player of the season. It was a given that Chelsea wasn't going to make it much longer considering her lack of air time. But her challenge prowess was impressive & I'm annoyed that she didn't get more respect for it.

And now here we sit. SuperDregs are in FIRST place. It's clearly temporary, and yet...

Next comes Eric, who has made an impressive run this season. But with zany Angela being his only leg to stand on, I think it's unlikely he'll make it into the end zone. Which gets us to my team & Baggins. With a slim 9 point lead and an eerily similar team, it really comes down to whether Seabass or Donathan will go the distance.

If I were any other player on the island, I'd definitely be taking Seabass with me to the finals. That dude has done nothing, and would be completely incapable of arguing his case at Final Tribal. Donathan has played a MUCH better game, and I'd love to see him make the finals (though not if it costs us the season).

The Teams:

SuperDreg: 118 points

• [Chelsea (33 pts)]
• [Chris (26 pts)]
• [Chelsea (33 pts)]
• [Chris (26 pts)]

Eric: 114 points

• [Michael (32 pts)]
• [Michael (32 pts)]
• Angela (19 pts)
• Angela (19 pts)
• [Desiree (12 pts)]

Michal & Ben: 90 points

• Wendell (26 pts)
• [Jenna (19 pts)]
• Laurel (19 pts)
• Sebastian (14 pts)
• [Desiree (12 pts)]

Bagginses: 81 points

• [Stephanie (-5 pts)]
• Wendell (26 pts)
• [Libby (26 pts)]
• Laurel (19 pts)
• Donathan (15 pts)

MoonBee: 52 points

• [Brendan (-6 pts)]
• [Libby (26 pts)]
• Kellyn (7 pts)
• [Jenna (19 pts)]
• [James (6 pts)]

Phil: 50 points

• [Brendan (-6 pts)]
• Dom (27 pts)
• Dom (27 pts)
• [Bradley (1 pts)]
• [Bradley (1 pts)]

Doug & Bri: 36 points

• [Stephanie (-5 pts)]
• Sebastian (14 pts)
• Donathan (14 pts)
• Kellyn (7 pts)
• [James (6 pts)]

Power Rankings:

1. Michal and Ben - I'm giving us the edge over Baggins due to the slight point advantage & because I think Seabass has a better shot of making the finals than Donathan. But it's basically a toss up.
2. Bagginses - I absolutely adore the Laurel/Donathan alliance. They have almost never actually agreed with each other in any strategic conversation and they probably have nothing in common at all. But they are both extremely loyal to each other & respect each others' opinions. I love the dynamic! With that being said, I think Donathan is doing well but is being held back by following Laurel's lead. Laurel is playing the best game for herself, but that means Donathan is missing out.
3. Phil - Dom's the dark horse in this pool. Phil's well behind in points but with a huge run giving him double the points, I cannot count this team out. A couple challenge wins, a properly played idol, and Phil is right in this thing.
4. Eric - Angela did better than expected this season, but I'm not expecting much more from her. Again, she'd be a great choice to take to finals, but I'm not sure that anyone with power can trust her enough to bring her along. 
5. SuperDregs - Easily the best Dreg team of Survivor Pool. Well played, dregs, well played. 
6. Doug and Bri - Doug & Bri have a decent number of players left, but they all are underperforming point-wise. Maybe with SuperChelsea gone, though, a window will open for some late point scoring?
7. MoonBee - This team is just sad. 

Douche of the Week:

I guess I'll just throw all my DoW votes from the last few weeks at Kellyn.